Another weekend without enough volunteers, a last minute custom video was added, and that projector lamp still hasn't been changed. How many weeks have you had similar to this? These seem to be more and more frequent in my life. As these things start to cave in on me, I tend to feel beat down and worn out. I often find myself looking at the grass on the other side of the fence. Other churches are Oz-like, with super-green grass, and endless budgets. They have me wondering why I am stuck where I am. Why are they blessed with so much, when I can't seem to get a weekend off?
These are real situations that those of us in ministry experience often. Some of you reading this may be burned out - heading out the door of your church feeling utterly defeated. I feel for you, I've been there. This doesn't make you a weak person or a bad Christian. Ministry is hard, and burnout is a real problem. I have stood toe to toe with burnout in my ministry. It's not a fun place, but I want to encourage you through it.
When you hit a wall, it hurts, and I recently hit it hard. I had been running at full steam and felt like I was getting nowhere fast. It seemed that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't catch a break. A lot of times it was just the little stuff, but all of those small things piled on top of one another to create a huge mountain. Suddenly I didn't even want to go in to work. I was in a zombie-esq state, only doing what was absolutely necessary for service. This feeling of inability and ineffectiveness left me wondering if I was cut out for what God had called me to. Was I really supposed to be in full-time ministry?
I realized at the heart of things, I was not even going through the motions anymore. I had given up daily devotions, stopped listening to the weekend sermons, and my prayer life was just a short “God help me” when things seemed to get rough. Until one day I was reminded of this section of scripture:
This feeling of inability and ineffectiveness left me wondering if I was cut out for what God had called me to.
1 Corinthians 9:24-26 “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air.”
This scripture really spoke to me - have I gone into strict training? Not simply for the day job that I receive a paycheck for (the crown that will not last), but for this calling that God has led each of us to...serving Him no matter what is thrown at us.
I have been striving to turn around my attitude, changing this “poor me” point of view into one of seeing the bigger picture of ministry. The lyrics of that old hymn, “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus,” really ring true here:
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Focusing on Him makes all the things of earth - like the volunteer who is driving you crazy, the lack of proper lighting, or the poor quality projectors you have to deal with - fade into the background. A portable church I used to be active in growing up had a banner they hung on the lip of the stage each week that read: “It's all about Jesus.” Next time you are feeling burned out, remember that it's all about Jesus. Like Peter walking on water, keep your eyes focused on Him or you will find yourself drowning.
